Joy A. Mead

When my British husband and I got married and I moved from San Francisco to London, I couldn’t yet imagine what it would look like to raise a family with my mother living five thousand miles and an ocean apart—with no chance of any daily, practical support.

Three years later, we were blessed by the birth of our lovely daughter, as our adventure in parenthood had just begun. In those first few weeks of broken sleep, endless feedings, and constant diaper changes, I remember regularly breaking down in tears because I was starting to grasp the depth of my grief at not having my mom, Annie, here to help out. No homecooked meals dropped off, laundry and dishes washed and put away, no physical hugs to encourage me in my new motherhood—and to make it even more painful, I had to daily wait until mid-afternoon to even call my mom for advice with an eight-hour time difference between us!

About three more years later, our charming son arrived, growing our family to a party of four. Once again, I was flooded with the emotions of sadness, grief, and loneliness felt previously with my daughter’s birth—only this time, everything felt more challenging with two little ones to look after.

One of the worst bits for me as a new mother was questioning if my children would ever have a deep bonding with my parents at all. Would there be any closeness? Even with our annual trips, would Anna and Luke find a way to connect with their grandparents who live on the other side of the world?

One particular Christmas, we were waiting at London’s Heathrow Airport arrivals to collect my parents. Baby Luke was strapped on me in the infant carrier and three-year-old Anna held my hand patiently. As my parents emerged through the exit doors, Anna let go of my hand to run straight up to my mother, throwing her arms around her neck in the most loving embrace! Her Annie had arrived, and it didn’t matter that numerous days and months had passed since their last visit—both grandma and granddaughter would pick up right where they had left off! Instinctively, my heart swelled and tears formed as I witnessed such a precious moment, and I felt God answer my longing question—yes, a special, unbreakable bond was being forged, despite all the geographical distance and time zones!

Grandma Annie (and Papa Glenn) have thoughtfully invested in their relationship with my daughter and son with the greatest gift grandparents could ever give to their grandchildren—quality time. They only have “in person” time once a year, however they literally make every moment count. My husband and I always delight in catching glimpses of their love poured out on our children. Even witnessing the most simplistic hug, story read, or game played is sacred to us, as our children have very limited days with my parents.

In the months between visits, Anna and Luke look forward to Annie’s elaborate care packages, complete with their favorite American cereals and snacks, pajamas, socks, and various clothing items. It truly feels magical how with every item opened, my daughter and son can sense all of the love and attention to detail that Annie has poured into her care packages. Across the distance, my children look forward to epic video calls with their American grandparents, always lasting at least an hour! I’m always amazed how Anna and Luke can still manage to boss Annie and Papa around in their pretend games without even being in the same location! The fact that my parents play along is just heartwarming.

And when we all miss Grandma Annie, all I have to do is recall what a loving, devoted mother she was to me, and God helps remind me how much of her lives on in my own motherhood. From baking pumpkin muffins or making her well-known lentil soup, to rubbing my children’s backs in the same gentle way, or singing her personalized lullabies, Annie’s love is never far from us. Her ways have so influenced me that they just naturally permeate straight into how I love my family.

I wouldn’t have asked to ever live this far from my mother, spending long days and weeks apart. Still, God in his lovingkindness, has knitted our hearts together and has held us perfectly together by the Holy Spirit. I am forever grateful for my mom’s nurturing of my soul, and I’m even more in awe and appreciation of how beautifully and generously she loves her grandchildren. What a valuable, timeless treasure Anna and Luke can store in their hearts throughout childhood and beyond!