Joy A. Mead

“If you don’t start your child with extra tuition at least two years before the exam, she won’t stand a chance of passing!”

“Sure, it feels like you have to sacrifice their childhood with all the extra hours of studying, but you want them to get into the best school, right?”

“We started our children as early as possible, and they took several mock exams first, to be ready for the real exam.”

These are the types of comments I have received over the years from parents I have encountered with older children. Meaning well and sharing from their own experiences, I tried to avoid the overwhelming pressure building up as our daughter approached her second to last year of primary school. My mind deliberately ignored the fact that Anna was growing up quickly, yet I knew I would have to face my own fears about her going to secondary school very soon.

Last autumn, my husband and I had conversations about our daughter and the whole secondary school process. Having grown up in America with high school starting at thirteen, the thought of our first baby going off to British secondary school at eleven terrified me as a protective mother. Yet, I could no longer deny the obvious—it was time to bravely face this new step in an unfamiliar educational system, for Anna’s sake.

After lengthy discussions and further chats with Anna, albeit a year later than we had been advised to start, Charlie and I decided to sign Anna up for extra tutoring in Math and English toward preparation for the secondary school entrance exam—a weekly commitment on all of us with the lessons and extra homework. Our thoughts brought us to the conclusion of, “What have we got to lose? If Anna were to do well on the exam, it would open up the chance and opportunity to apply to a larger pool of secondary schools. And if her marks weren’t as high, at least the extra lessons would have helped prepare her toward secondary school and boosted her confidence in Math and English.”

Having now completed ten months of extra studies, we are now at the eve of our daughter’s first important exam of her educational career. At times, it has felt like pulling teeth, getting Anna to do extra homework—especially over the summer months when she would have rather been taking a break. At the start, I knew it would be a financial commitment from us and a time commitment from Anna, however, I didn’t understand how much time I personally would have to invest through sitting in with online lessons, being available for homework questions, and uploading completed work to her teacher. It’s been a character-building journey for our entire family!

This whole process has made me reflect on how society measures success compared with how vastly different God views it. The world tells us that if we fail to acquire high marks on exams, we must not be smart enough and are undeserving of a place at a top school. Society also teaches us that we must be in competition with fellow students—and that pressure only escalates through secondary school, university, the workplace, and beyond. The measure of societal success is only defined by what we can achieve and flaunt to those around us—only then are we deemed as valuable, leaving many students to feel that they aren’t “good enough”.

On the contrary, God says we have value simply because we are part of his creation. Isaiah 43:1-3 tells us that we have been called by name, that we are God’s children—that we belong. Just like the physical body is made up of many different parts, such is true for our wide range of spiritual giftings and how we share God’s love with others. (1 Corinthians 12:14-20) I believe this also applies to how uniquely God has made each one of us—to each have our own purpose in this world and contribute to bringing forth good in our communities. John 3:16 reminds us that, “God so loved the world that he gave his one and only Son, that whoever believes in him shall not perish but have eternal life.” He didn’t just come for a selective few but for all—this should confirm to each one of us that God values us all and that our worldly success or lack thereof cannot define fully who we are as individuals.

For my children as well as all students who will take exams within their schooling, I pray and hope that they would not define their value as people, solely on their academic triumphs or failures. There is so much more to life than strictly academic exams. Instead, each student should focus on becoming the best version of themselves and finding what God wants him or her to be, developing their various abilities and talents.

Please join me in a prayer for students:

Dear Heavenly Father,

We thank you for our students and the opportunity they have to learn and grow through education.

We praise you for each child, uniquely created to do wonderful things in this world.

Please grant each student the ability to do his or her best and no matter what their exam results might be, allow them to know that you are proud of all their efforts.

Help them to know that giving their best is good enough.

Grant each student a joy for learning, the desire to grow daily, and the drive to pursue the path of opportunities you have for each one.

Bless their diligence, perseverance, and efforts as they learn to do their work for you.

Bring your hope, faith, and joy to each student for their future.

In Jesus’ name we pray,

Amen.

Some verses to reflect on:

When doubt creeps in, we can remember that God has good works for us to do.

“For we are God’s workmanship, created in Christ Jesus to do good works, which God prepared in advance for us to do.”—Ephesians 2:10

Whether it is school or any kind of work, we can invite God to be right there with us and ask him to guide us in what we do in life.

“May the favor of the Lord our God rest upon us; establish the work of our hands for us—yes, establish the work of our hands.”—Psalm 90:17

These have been two of my favorite verses since I was a student myself, because it reminds me that whatever I am working on can be offered as my sacrifice to God. I want to live for him in all that I do.

“Whatever you do, work at it with all your heart, as working for the Lord, not for men, since you know that you will received an inheritance from the Lord as a reward. It is the Lord Christ you are serving.”—Colossians 3:23-24

You were created by God for good works.

God establishes your work.

You serve God when you work at it with all your heart.